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What Are Creative Insults?

Creative insults are a step above your average insults. Insulting someone in a creative way involves using your imagination to act in a way or say something that is offensive or rude to someone.

Great creative insults make use of original ideas. They’re so unique and original that it’s hard to make a comeback if you’re the one being insulted!

Although insults tend to be offensive, they can also be a twisted way of showing affection to your friends. Good friends know how to appreciate creative insults, especially if they’re funny. Real friends will insult you back! What matters is that everyone knows how to laugh it off!

👉 You don’t always have to insult your friends to make conversations more interesting. We’ve put together some tips to help you have fun when hanging out with friends or meeting people for the first time. Here are some conversation starters to get you started!

Best Creative Insults

The best creative insults can be quite imaginative and funny. They’re so extraordinary that people might need a minute or two to understand it. Whether you have a light quarrel with someone or you’re joking around with friends, throwing creative insults will definitely make the mood more exciting!

Hopefully, you and your friends share the same sense of humor that insults will bounce off everyone!

1. You lack brains so much that you can float on water.

At least you don’t have to worry about drowning since you can just float to the surface.

2. It would help if you were the poster child of a condom company.

Their sales will skyrocket! You’ll be the face of contraception!

3. You’re about as useful as the white crayon.

Out of all my crayons, I use that one the least. How does it feel to be almost useless?

4. Did you use a mud puddle as a mirror this morning?

Just call it an organic mirror.

5. Were you carrying an umbrella when God was giving out beauty?

Oof. This one has got to sting.

6. Explaining to you is like teaching calculus to a lemur.

It’s practically impossible. Do you even know what a lemur is?

7. If you ran like your mouth, maybe you’d win a gold medal.

At least you win something in life, but no one likes a big mouth.

8. You’re as sharp as a marble.

It’s like you don’t have any sharpness to you. You’re not smart at all!

9. There’s some shit on your clothes. Oh, nope. That’s just you.

How do you clean it off if it’s you?

10. You’re as useful as a condom with holes on it.

Like you just want to sabotage us all.

11. You look like you have more craters than the moon.

I hope I only see you at night too, or maybe never?

12. Wanna know what’s the difference between you and eggs? Eggs get laid, and you don’t.

How does it feel like knowing eggs are more popular than you?

13. Why do you play so hard to get for someone hard to want?

In other words, no one wants you! Why are you acting like that?

14. I will call you pussy. But you lack warmth and depth.

I’m not a fan of this word. But the use of this word makes sense, right?

15. If opposites attract, then I hope you meet someone who is attractive, honest, intelligent, and cultured.

I hope you meet them, but I hope they don’t meet you!

👉 If you want to insult your friend in the nastiest and snarkiest way, then you’ll enjoy this list of the very best insults around. Click here for our list of the best insults that you can use!


Funny Creative Insults

The most creative insults usually bring out the most laughs. Why? Because funny, creative insults are great for shocking people into laughter! These are the kinds of jokes that you don’t easily think of, but when you hear them, you can’t help laughing whether you want to or not!

It takes a little out-of-the-box thinking to come up with funny, creative insults. If you don’t want to rack your brains just to insult someone, it’s a good thing that we’ve put together the funniest creative insults that you can use right away!

1. You should carry a plant around with you to replace the oxygen you waste.

That would be a sight to see!

2. You look like the two guys from 21st Jump Street combined.

That’s a strange combination, and not in a good way!

3. You should stop using your head as a container for your teeth.

Did you get that, or did it take some time to sink in?

4. You are living proof that even ugly people have sex.

This is a mean way to say someone’s parents are ugly!

Suggested read: Yo Mama Jokes

5. You look like the type of person who can’t spell DNA.

Guess you’ll have to prove people wrong.

6. Some drink from the fountain of knowledge. You only gargled.

You didn’t get a lot of knowledge, huh?

7. Do you only use your head to get haircuts?

Your head is for thinking too!

8. Had your parents not heard of contraception?

You are loved and wanted!

9. If you ate trash, it would be cannibalism.

Someone just called you trash!

10. Everyone needs love, but you pay for it.

It’s called a mutually beneficial relationship!

11. You look like a stepped-on sandcastle.

I can’t even imagine it!

12. I see that you’ve set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.

Do yourself a favor and run!

13. You look like a garden gnome.

It’s one way of insulting someone’s lack of height.

🤓 Suggested read: 40+ Funny Insults for Friends

14. You are a complete tool, but you’re not even useful.

No one likes useless tools.

Okay, mocking incest may seem a little childish, but it’s brilliant.


Bonus: More Creative Insults

We’ve got more creative insults that will either shut people up or make them LOL. We’ve collected a bunch of creative ways to insult someone’s looks, intelligence, or even their mere existence!

Warning! Some of these insults can hit below the belt, and you’ll be surprised at how creative they can get!

1. If you were the light at the end of the tunnel, I’d turn back around.

You have a face that makes people say, “Thanks, but no thanks!”

2. If I throw a stick, will you leave?

It would help if you acted like a real dog to be treated like one.

3. What kind of contraception do you use? Your face?

It must be effective!

🤓 Suggested read: Top 40 What's the Difference Between Jokes

4. I’ll give you a +1 so you can invite your friend… if you have one.

Don’t worry. You still have time to find a friend!

5. I bet your parents change the subject when their friends ask about you.

Don’t listen to this. Your parents are proud of you!

6. I’d say you’re “dumb as a rock,” but at least a rock can hold a door open.

You have your uses too, and you’ll figure it out. Someday.

7. Why don’t you go take a long walk off a short pier?

This is one way of telling someone to get lost!

8. You look like someone just hit “Random” on the customization screen.

Everyone is beautiful!

9. If ignorance is bliss, then you must be one happy idiot.

At least you’re happy! It’s better to be a happy idiot than a suffering genius.

10. You’re so far behind you think you’re first.

That’s not good! Don’t delude yourself!

Suggested read: Egg Puns

11. When it was raining brains, were you holding an umbrella?

You must have missed many brains, which explains a lot.

12. You could hide your own Easter eggs and forget where they are.

Are you forgetful or dumb? I can’t decide between the two.

13. If you had another brain, it would be lonely.

There’s nothing there! It’s empty!

14. Keep rolling your eyes. Maybe you’ll find a brain back there.

It’s better to reply than just roll your eyes.

15. You look like you eat buttons off the remote control.

This doesn’t even make sense, but it’s pretty insulting.

👉 If you’re looking for more insults, we have some more that are so funny. They might make you spit out your drink if you’re drinking one! Test your friends’ patience and sense of humor with these funny insults!

Conversation Starters

Whether you’re at a party talking to someone you’ve just met or spent time with friends you haven’t seen in awhile, coming up with a good conversation starter that isn’t just boring small talk can be a struggle. When you begin a discussion with someone, you want it to be interesting, insightful, and entertaining.