200 Questions for couples

• Relationship Questions Generator
• Getting to know your partner
• Questions about their family and childhood
• Relationship questions
• Couple questions about sex
• Questions about having kids

It’s no secret; romantic relationships require effort and communication to thrive. And that includes asking the right questions to get to know each other better. Whether you’re in a new relationship or have been together for years, taking the time to ask meaningful questions can help spark intimacy and strengthen your bond.

But let’s be real, coming up with good questions can be challenging, especially if small talk is not your strong suit. That’s where our ultimate list of 200 questions for couples comes in handy!

So, grab your partner and get ready to dive deep into this educational, informative, and witty conversation guide.

Relationship Questions Generator

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Getting to know your partner questions

One essential thing in a relationship is learning about your partner. You can know what to expect from them and can figure out if you two are a good match.

1. What has been your biggest screw up so far?
2. What book or movie do you wish you could experience for the first time again?
3. Are you ashamed of anything you did in the past? If you are comfortable talking about it, what was it?
4. What biases do you think you have?
5. Do you prefer living in the countryside, in a town, or in a big city? Why?
6. What’s normal now that will be considered unethical and barbaric in 100 years?
7. How forgiving are you?
8. When do you feel like you are really in your element?
9. What friend have you not thought about in a long time?
10. Do you believe in good luck and bad luck? How about things that are lucky or unlucky?
11. Who is the most irritating person you know?
12. What brings meaning to your life?
13. What is the nicest compliment you’ve received?
14. What is the hardest life lesson you’ve had to learn?
15. What life experiences did you miss out on?
16. Do you think the world is improving or getting worse? Why?
17. What’s the most unethical thing you do regularly?
18. What is your weakness?
19. What’s your fondest memory of a tree?
20. What would the best version of you be like?
21. What do you most like to do when you have alone time?
22. What’s a secret you’ve never told anyone?
23. Would you take 3 million dollars if it meant that the person you hate most in the world gets 9 million?
24. How likely are you to believe in conspiracy theories?
25. When is your favorite time of day?
26. What are your top 5 rules for life?
27. What do you look forward to most in the day?
28. What are two of the most important events in your life?
29. What’s the most dangerous, thrill-seeking thing you would consider doing?
30. If you had a friend who spoke to you the same way you talk to yourself, would you keep them as a friend?
31. Are you happy with the career path you chose, or do you wish you had chosen a different career?
32. What were the three most important turning points in your life?
33. What’s your biggest regret?
34. When has a mundane occurrence or chance completely changed the course of your life?
35. What would be the greatest gift to receive?
36. What is the saddest thing about your life that nobody knows?
37. What’s the most peaceful/restful night of sleep you’ve had?
38. How well do you think you would handle prison?
39. What is your best (not worst) flaw?
40. If you received a salary to follow whatever passion you wanted to, what would you do?
41. What is the most significant change you would like to make in your life?
42. What makes you dislike a person?
43. What would your perfect life look like?
44. Do you think you are a confident person? Why or why not?
45. What are some alcohol-induced stories of your younger days?
46. What are some of the telltale signs of a shallow person?
47. What have you struggled with your entire life?
48. What is something we should enjoy more because it won’t be around for long?
49. How superstitious are you?
50. What is something you know is bad for you, but you can’t seem to get away from it?
51. What question do you most want an answer to?
52. What has been a recurring theme in your life?
53. What’s the most disheartening and heartening realization you have come to?
54. Who do you act nice around but secretly dislike?
55. What petty thing that people do gets on your nerves?
56. What’s the most ambitious thing you’ve attempted?
57. What’s your ideal way to spend a vacation?
58. What was the hardest lesson you’ve had to learn?
59. What’s the biggest betrayal you have ever experienced?
60. What are the best and worst things about the period of history we are living through?
61. What’s the craziest thing that has happened at a job you worked at?
62. What were the healthiest and unhealthiest periods of your life?
63. What musical instrument do you wish you could play?
64. Is there anything you did wrong for years and years, only to discover later that you were doing it wrong?
65. Who do you want to be more like, or who do you look up to most?
66. What’s the biggest financial mistake you’ve made?
67. Tell me about a time you almost died.
68. What are you battling that you don’t tell anyone about?
69. What’s your favorite thing in your / our house?
70. Are you happy with the people you surround yourself with? Why or why not?
71. If you could open a business, what type of business would you open?
72. What’s something you screwed up and then tried to hide?
73. What’s the worst emotional or mental anguish you’ve endured?
74. What’s the most rewarding thing in your daily routine?
75. Are you hopeful about your future?
76. What makes you lose faith in humanity when you think about it?
77. What is something that you are dreading?
78. What’s the worst thing that people are proud of?
79. What are you purposefully ignoring even though you know you should probably deal with it?
80. How good are you at reading people?
81. What three words best describe you?
82. What’s something that a lot of people are afraid of, but you aren’t?
83. What makes you feel super fancy?
84. When you’re gone when you want to be remembered for?
85. What weird thing stresses you out more than it should?
86. What was your most inappropriate or embarrassing fart?
87. What job do you think you were born to do?
88. What are some words of wisdom that have stuck with you all these years?
89. What has taken up too much of your life?
90. If you could instantly learn a talent or skill, what would you want to know how to do?
91. What do you wish you were better at?
92. What are kinds of things do you find repulsive?
93. What’s a question you wish people would ask more often?
94. What is something you wish you could say to people but can’t?
95. What was the most painful thing to hear?
96. What do you like most about where we live?
97. What luxury do you enjoy treating yourself to?
98. If money was no object, and with no input from me, how would you decorate your / our house?
99. What’s the biggest favor you’ve done for someone?
100. How well do you know yourself?
101. What animal are you most afraid of?
102. What’s the most stressful situation you’ve been in? How did you handle it?
103. What’s the best way for someone to improve themselves?
104. What do you think happens after death?
105. What is way more difficult than it sounds?
106. If you had a million dollars to give to any charity, what type of charity would you give it to?
107. When was the last time you cried?
108. If you could travel to any country in the world for one month, where would you go?
109. Who do you miss the most?
110. What’s the scariest / creepiest place you have ever been to?
111. What are some of the most attractive traits a person can have?
112. What is something that scares you on a daily basis?
113. What untrue thing did you believe for an incredibly long time?
114. If there was a horrible accident and you were unconscious and on life support, how long would you want to be on life support?
115. What’s your most embarrassing story about being sick?
116. What do you want out of life?
117. What brings you the most joy?
118. How does your current morning routine compare to your ideal morning routine?
119. How do you think society is changing? Do you think we’ll change with it?
120. How often do you change your opinions or how you view the world?
121. What can someone do that makes them immediately unattractive to you, no matter how attractive they are physically?
122. What are some of the most pleasant sensations for you?
123. What was the most productive time in your life? How about the least productive?
124. What about yourself, are you most proud of?
125. What do you worry about?
126. Do you think people more people look down on you or up to you? Why?
127. What part of you as a person still needs a lot of work?
128. What scandal happened in your neighbor or town when you were growing up?
129. What do you take for granted?
130. What do you think your best and worst personality traits are?
131. What’s the biggest opportunity you were given?
132. What would you want your obituary to say?
133. How did you fall out with some of your previously close friends?
134. How well do you function under a lot of pressure?
135. When are you the most “you”?
136. What calms you down the most?
137. What’s the most awkward social situation you’ve been in?
138. Is it better to trust people or not trust people? And why?
139. What is your favorite memory of someone who isn’t in your life anymore?
140. What small pleasures do you enjoy the most?
141. What age would you like to live?
142. What are you most sentimental about?

Questions about their family and childhood

When you are looking for relationship questions, it’s always important to ask about family and childhood. Knowing where your partner came from can help you understand how they are now.

1. What school subjects did you like and hate most when you were in school?
2. What family vacations did you take as a child?
3. What small, seemingly insignificant thing did your parents, or someone else say when you were a child that has stuck with you all this time?
4. What habits do you still have from childhood?
5. What is the best or worst thing you inherited from your parents?
6. What is something your parents did or used to do that really embarrassed you?
7. What made you realize that your parents were just human like everyone else?
8. What movie seriously scarred you as a child or as an adult?
9. What irrational fears did you have as a child?
10. How traditionally “normal” was your family?
11. Children are often very similar to their parents. How do you want to be different than your parents? And how do you want to be similar to them?
12. What toy played the most significant part of your childhood?
13. What are some of your earliest memories?
14. What unique game did you frequently play as a child?

Relationship questions

Here are the main questions for couples that deal with the relationship itself. It’s important to be non-judgmental when asking and answering these questions. It’s not about telling your partner the things they do wrong or the things you want from them. It’s about working together as a couple to build a healthy relationship.

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1. What’s your favorite gift I’ve given you?
2. What could we do to make our relationship stronger?
3. What new hobbies or activities would you like to try together as a couple?
4. What makes us different than other couples?
5. What’s your favorite way we spend time together?
6. What’s the best relationship advice you’ve received?
7. What’s our greatest strength as a couple?
8. What do you think would bring us closer together as a couple?
9. What are some things you really like about me?
10. What kind of memories do you want to make together?
11. What can I do to help us the most?
12. How much space / alone time should people in a relationship give each other?
13. What would be a deal-breaker for our relationship, something you couldn’t forgive?
14. Where do you want to live when we retire?
15. What does a happy and healthy relationship look like to you?
16. How realistic do you think couples in movies and TV are?
17. What is something small that we can do daily for each other to make our lives better?
18. What are some of your relationship goals?
19. In what areas do you think our personalities complement each other? (i.e., One is too reckless, and the other is overly cautious, and it balances out to a happy medium.)
20. How important is it for individuals in a relationship to maintain their own separate identity?
21. What adventure would you like to go on with me?
22. What do I do that makes you the happiest?
23. What makes our relationship better than other relationships?
24. What do you think would be the best way to strengthen our relationship?
25. What do you think is an essential thing in a successful relationship?
26. What is something I did that you thought was exceptionally kind or thoughtful?
27. What do you see as your role in our relationship?
28. What questions should partners ask each other before getting married?
29. What do you think our life will look like in 10 years?
30. How well do you think we communicate?
31. What do you think is the hardest thing about marriage/being in a relationship?

Couple questions about sex

Sex is an important topic to talk about in any relationship. It’s important to know what each of you considers a healthy and enjoyable sex life.

1. What are you into, but haven’t told me about?
2. Besides orgasms, what is the best part of sex?
3. What do I do outside the bedroom that turns you on?
4. What’s the most embarrassing thing that has happened to you while having sex?
5. How well do you think our sex drives match up?
6. What would you like me to do in the bedroom to spice things up a bit?
7. What do I do in bed that drives you wild?
8. What’s better than great sex?
9. What is the most adventurous thing you’ve done sexually?
10. When am I at my sexiest?
11. How important do you think sex is in our relationship?

Couple questions about having kids

A couple must be on the same page when it comes to kids. There can be a lot of strife and heartache in a relationship if one partner wants kids and the other doesn’t, or if you both have wildly different expectations for raising children.

1. Do you think it is more important for a couple with kids to focus on the kids more or each other more? Why?
2. How would we know if we did our job as parents well?
3. What’s the worst parenting mistake a couple can make?
4. Do you eventually want to have children? How many children do you ultimately want? Why?
5. How do you think having kids will / has changed our lives and relationship?
6. What is the best way to raise children?

If you’re looking for advice on strengthening your relationships, check out these books. They offer tips on everything from communication to conflict resolution and can help you build a stronger, more lasting bond with your partner!

👉 Suggested read: 70 Conversation Starters for Couples

1. Love: The Psychology of Attraction: A Practical Guide to Successful Dating and a Happy Relationship
2. Single, Dating, Engaged, Married: Navigating Life and Love in the Modern Age
3. The Power of Four Bases for Relationships: Can You Hit a Home Run in a Relationship?
4. Couple’s Bucket List: 101 Fun, Engaging Dating Ideas
5. Helping Gay Men Find Love: Tips for Guys on Dating and Beginning a Healthy Relationship

PumPum® — Advice for Couples Grow together, connect daily, and find your relationship strength.