How to tell if a girl likes you
Sometimes it is difficult to determine whether a woman is interested in you or not. Is she just being nice, or is she trying to flirt with you? We'll help you find out.Conversation Starters 👇
🙋♀️ How to tell if a girl likes you
So there is this one girl who is amazingly fascinating to you, and you just can’t figure her out. Is she just being nice, or is she flirting with you? Things get really tricky if she is sending mixed signals. Not all of us are pick-up artists with a sixth sense of whether or not a woman thinks you are hot. However, some women simply cannot be figured out. This guessing game of whether or not someone likes you can be extremely tiring. But certain signs can tell you whether a woman likes you or not.
Of course, these are all just mere indications, so they do not have to be 100 percent correct. Everyone is different. But the more of these points apply, the more likely it is that she actually thinks you are great and maybe even wants you. And believe me: the more you deal with these signs, the better you will see whether a woman finds you hot or not. But don’t take it all to heart and stop overthinking each of her gestures. This will only drive you crazy. Just let it go and enjoy the ride. To win a heart is like a dance that is supposed to be fun.
This article is divided into several areas. At the beginning, we deal with the signs; after that, we clarify whether she is only friendly or if there is real interest, and then we will be talking about how to increase her interest.
Enjoy our article, and good luck!
😉 Signs she likes you
Don’t be afraid of the sheer number of points below. There are numerous signs of whether a woman finds you attractive. The catch with the whole thing is that some of the following signals may apply accidentally, or you may just be interpreting too much into her actions. However, if a significant number of these apply to the girl you like, then chances are she has feelings for you. So go ahead, take a look, but don’t drive yourself crazy.
She likes to talk to you
This one can be difficult to interpret. Some girls who are into you smile all over the face when they talk to you, while others get overwhelmed by their nervousness and prefer to avoid the situation. But also pay attention to whether she seeks the conversation with you on her own or whether you are always the one who starts it. Is she just standing around waiting to be talked to? And when you speak to her, does she smile or seem to enjoy it? Does she behave differently than usual?
She’s always around
And with this, I mean in situations where she does not need to be near you. Is she usually less than five meters away from you during a break at school, at university, or in the office? Without you having made an appointment or anything like that with her, she seems to be always around? Coincidentally, she’s also at the concert or at the bar, which you mentioned in passing, being there on the weekend? Or is it something completely different, like you continuously meet in the kitchen in the office when you just wanted to get some coffee? Depending on the situation and environment, this can mean a lot or nothing.
Of course, these could all be coincidences, but do they actually exist, or does everything follow a higher plan? Well, now we’re getting a little too philosophical. Nonetheless, this can very well suggest that she likes you. It is only logical that people who find you attractive also seek your company—this way, women want to give you the chance to talk to them.
She laughs at your jokes
Even if you make a joke that you hardly find funny yourself, is she the first to start laughing? Almost every sentence you utter that doesn’t seem serious makes her giggle? It’s a pretty clear indication that she likes you if it is that way. However, some insecure people always laugh or smile out of courtesy, just to make no negative impression on others.
Pay attention to her eyes
Does she avoid eye contact? Some girls find it uncomfortable to look their crush in the eye or be caught looking at them. Others consciously look for your gaze and then keep it upright. If she even smiles, it is a pretty clear signal that she is interested in you.
She notices your presence
Even if she changes her behavior inconspicuously when she notices that you are entering the room, it can say a lot. Suddenly she sits upright, moves more gracefully, or smiles at you obviously and greets you warmly? Then it can all mean that she likes you a little bit more than other people.
She smiles warmly at you
As mentioned in the last point, a smile that comes from the heart can mean a lot. But only if she smiles at you honestly and warmly. So that she gets tiny wrinkles around her eyes, either she is generally an amicable person, or you are her motivation for smiling that way.
She touches you
If she touches you frequently, especially casually, seeks physical closeness, or even likes to hug you, she’ll probably like you very much; unfortunately, this can also be purely platonic. That very much depends on how she touches you.
Pay attention to clues from your friends
If her circle of friends somehow behaves differently around you or asks what you think of her, it may mean they know more. If her friends leave you room to talk, for example, sit back and no longer take in the girl you are interested in, it may mean that she has told them about you or speaks about you regularly and that her friends want to help her to conquer your heart. If her friends giggle, smile, grin or watch you both interact as soon as you’re around, they know more: She likes you.
She is waiting for others to leave to talk to you
She wants to talk to you undisturbed and waits for others to leave, so she the both of you aren’t distracted by others? Does she catch you just to have a relatively insignificant conversation? Perhaps it all happens much more subtly so that you hardly notice it. Still, this behavior is usually a sign of interest.
She starts to be interested in the same things as you
Do you like soccer, video games, anime, art, whatever? And she paid little attention to one of these topics in the past, but now seems to be interested in it? Then it is pretty clear that she only does all of this to make her look more exciting for you or to have conversation topics with you.
She plays with her hair
Some consider this sign more of a myth, and others say it is legit. But what is it about? Suppose she speaks to you and turns a strand of hair between her fingers or twists it around her finger. It can be a signal that she is flirting subconsciously, or it makes her nervous to speak to you. Most people get worried about things that are important to them and that they don’t want to embarrass themselves. But people are different, as has been said many times before. Some women are generally shy and always comb their hair with their fingers as soon as they speak to the opposite sex. So that can also be a pure quirk. However, if you only observe this phenomenon when she talks to you and not to another guy, it can very well be an indication of her interest in you.
She’s trying to get your attention
Women are usually much more subtle than men when they want to arouse the interest of their crush. They often try to make themselves extra pretty, wear a new, maybe even provocative outfit in your presence, or always adopt a completely different posture around you than usual. Does she stand there differently, especially in a sexy way? You know what attractive poses I mean: shoulders back, chest out, stomach in, buttocks emphasized. If she does something like this in your presence or during a conversation with you, she is almost certainly not averse to you.
Her posture is open
As already mentioned in the previous point, body language can reveal a lot. If she’s got an open body posture while speaking to you, it means she’s comfortable around you. Crossed arms signal the opposite of what you want, but can also be a sign that she is listening extremely concentrated. If that is the case, you should usually be aware of it. If she doesn’t know what to do with her hands while talking to you and is even holding an object and playing with it a little, it can also be a sign that you are somehow relevant to her. The direction in which her feet are pointing also reveals a lot. If they’re aimed at you, that’s an excellent sign. If she crosses them while sitting opposite you or crosses them under the chair, it could be a sign of nervousness. If they point away, for example, in the direction of a door or another person, it can mean that she is only speaking to you out of courtesy and wants to take to her heels.
But there is also an exceptional case: If a person mirrors the body language, then not only does the reflecting person find the mirrored person sympathetic, but also triggers sympathy in the mirrored one. So watch your dream woman: When she copies your movements - you touch your chin briefly, she touches hers; you drink, she starts to drink - then it’s a pretty safe bet that she’s somehow into you.
She’s nervous around you
As mentioned before, nervousness that arises when you are around can mean that she cares about you. But how does that express itself, apart from obvious things? There are some signs: If she touches her face a lot when she talks to you, is often blinking, pressing her lips together or - as already mentioned - playing with her hair, this can be a sign of nervousness. That, in turn, can mean that in some ways she likes you. However, some people are generally unsure about speaking with the opposite sex. You probably know the lady better than I do, so you know for sure whether she is generally a nervous person or just seems slightly flustered in your presence.
She interrupts conversations with others to speak to you
The title of this point is relatively self-explanatory. For example, if she is currently talking to friends, you enter the group, and she puts you in the center of her attention as soon as possible, it usually means that she likes you very much. So if she has the choice to talk to anyone, but prefers to speak to you, that’s a big plus.
She listens to you very carefully
She hangs on your every word and also remembers the things you told her? Then she definitely likes you.
She tries not to talk to other men around you
If she’s somehow ashamed when you enter the room while she is talking to another guy and the conversation ends as quickly as possible. It may mean that she doesn’t want you to think that she is interested in this man.
She pays attention to your reactions
For example, when she says something or tells a joke in a group of people, does she look at you to see your reaction? Then your opinion is very important to her, which usually also means that you are important to her. She wants to please you. If, however, she belongs to the type of person who generally asks for recognition and looks at everyone to assess their reaction, this point does not apply.
She messages you all the time
But that doesn’t mean anything if you know that she’s addicted to writing with people and just needs the pleasing feeling of a new message on her phone. Some people just love attention. This is especially noticeable if she keeps making you wait a long time. On the other hand, if she’s also quick to respond to your messages and obviously appreciates talking to you, then she probably likes you.
She writes you drunk messages
Self-explanatory: When she writes to you in a drunken state, she thinks of you. Drunk people are often said to wear their hearts on their sleeves. So if she even makes something like a confession of love, she’s pretty much into you, or - depending on the message she has written - she is just feeling lonely right now.
She follows you on social media
And by that, I don’t mean the usual followings on Instagram and so on. If she looks at each of your stories, maybe reacts to them again and again and likes almost every new post, she likes you pretty much or at least would not be opposed to you. But if she belongs to these wannabe influencers and just likes everything to promote herself, then that means practically nothing for you.
She mentions being single or asks about your relationship status
No matter how she does it, but when she talks about being single in front of you or asking you whether or not you have a girlfriend, it can be very significant - especially if she asks you why you don’t have one. However, if the former is the case and she keeps asking about one of your friends, it could just as well mean that she’s actually been keeping an eye on someone else she’s trying to reach through you.
She compliments you, especially if you look good
Got a new hairstyle, and she’s the first person to comment on it positively? You dressed differently, and she has to express her pleasure? Then she could very well be into you. But it could also be out of courtesy. However, if you haven’t actually changed anything and she suddenly sees you differently, things could be in your favor.
She does everything to spend time with you
As I said, women like to be a little more subtle. You may not even notice the stones that she is clearing out of the way to pander to you. For example, if you ask the question in your WhatsApp group of friends whether someone wants to do something today and she answers immediately, she at least likes to spend time with you very much. And if you even know that she had other plans and is canceling them for you, she probably has a crush on you.
She opens up to you
When someone opens up to you and talks about their problems, it means that they trust you. However, this can also indicate that you have slipped into the friendzone or are on the best way to get there.
She plans something with you in the future
If you talk about any activity and she immediately says that you have to do it together, she may unconsciously see you already by her side. If that happens all the time and you already have a proper list of things to do, she either sees you as her very best friend with whom she can do anything, or she fancies you a lot.
She teases you amicably
Well, that depends on the type of person she is. If she is a lively person who does this to everyone she likes, then your crush will at least feel comfortable with you. However, if she is rather a little shy and in your presence dares to come out of her shell and tease you, then she definitely likes you.
😵 Is she just being nice or interested?
So you have rummaged through our points and are not really sure whether she is just nice, likes you in a friendly way, or is actually interested? Finding out is an even more difficult thing that no one but your beloved can probably tell you one hundred percent. Does she only react when you get in touch? Or does she message you on her own because she wants to do something with you and doesn’t just need you to pack furniture? If a lot of the above points apply, she is most likely not only nice, but also interested in you. Get her, tiger. But there are also many manipulative people in this world, so don’t let yourself be used for sick games. For example, many women know about their charms and use them to their advantage. Some just flirt because they love the positive feedback and want to determine their sexual market value, so to speak, without really being interested in you. If you’re afraid she’s more the latter kind of person, then it’s best to disappear and leave the lady flat. Do not let yourself be exploited.
How do you determine now, however, whether there could be more between you? The only guarantee to find out is the following: Make the first move. Stop crushing your brain and ask her out on a date, tell her you’re interested in her. Although more and more women are making the first move, many things are still very conservative these days, and most women expect the man to approach them. Take a risk. Rejection hurts less than you think. But if most of the above points apply, you will most definitely succeed.
Please note the following points:
- As I said, do not wait for her to make the first move but rather do it yourself. Just do it. Ask her about a date. Grit your teeth and get to it! You can do it!
- Don’t impose on her. If you’ve misinterpreted her intentions and she has no romantic interest in you, let her go. No means no.
- Don’t hold it against her and be a good loser. Bear up: There are countless beautiful women out there.
- If she is in a relationship, then leave her be. You don’t want to cause bad blood. Even if she is dissatisfied with her partner, don’t push yourself between them. When a relationship begins with an ex-boyfriend’s jealousy drama, it can get tedious.
- If she sent you to the friend zone (you thought there was more between you, but she only sees you as a friend), you have to consider whether a friendship is enough for you. Never assume to get out from the friend zone through being kind etc. If you want her to be your partner, tell her that. If she can’t imagine it, sees you only as a friend, but friendship is not enough for you, then be brave enough to move on. It would only hurt you if you saw her with another guy, maybe even a friend of yours.
😏 How to raise her interest
Mickey & Sylvia already said it: Love is strange. So you want to increase the interest of your crush in you because you are either still not sure whether she is into you or you just want to fan the flames. Of course, there is no guarantee that if you follow this advice, that she will fall fling her arms around your neck afterward, but it certainly won’t reduce your chances.
Just about every woman likes guys who make her laugh. Just make sure not to be her clown, just prove that you don’t take life too seriously and have fun with it.
Pay attention to your body language
As mentioned in the tips above, body language is of enormous importance in love (actually in all of life). Get used to an upright posture: shoulders back (not too much), chest out, stomach in. It should all still look not too stiff. This can be exhausting at first as your muscles aren’t used to it, but will feel natural over time and give you more confidence. Don’t look at the ground; look straight ahead. Take a dominant posture, especially when you are standing. The legs should be at shoulder width, both equally loaded. And take your hands out of your pockets, especially when you’re talking to her. And as I said above: If you subtly mirror her gestures, it can also increase her sympathy for you.
Do some exercise and watch your diet. And even if it’s just a moderate workout before your daily shower, it can make a big difference in the long run. Don’t stuff yourself with fast food either, but be on a balanced diet. It is well known that a healthy mind lives in a healthy body. Every now and then you can of course treat yourself to something, but it shouldn’t degenerate into a daily treat. All of this sounds a bit hypocritical out of the mouth of a lazy guy like me. Still, even I, who sits and writes hours in front of the PC every day, takes his time to do at least a little exercise regularly. I walk for at least half an hour every day, do push-ups and squats before taking a shower in the morning, and eat reasonably healthy. You don’t have to overdo it, but the little things make all the difference.
This advice may sound a bit contradictory, but it usually helps enormously. Meet or surround yourself with other women. Desired men are desirable men. While many guys are deterred when the number of competitors is high, it is usually precisely the opposite for women. It’s like online reviews: if an item has umpteen reviews and is bought frequently, then there is definitely something to it - you don’t think twice about it and grab it. You don’t even have to flirt or date them if you think you’re going to offend the girl you’re into. But she will at least have her thoughts on the matter and believe that you are a good catch.
Live an exciting life
That sounds like horrible advice. How can you live an exciting life when your own is boring? You sit in the office for eight hours a day or more and then feel exhausted. You don’t experience anything, do you? Not correct. Go through life with open eyes, have fun at work or school, collect great stories. Even there, surely, a lot happens. You don’t have to go skydiving or travel every week; basically, you don’t have to do anything crazy. It’s enough if you do things, pursue a passion, try new things, etc. If you don’t have all of that, it’s time to change that. You have always wanted to try one or the other, but it was always outside your comfort zone? Just do it! Pick something and deal with it for a long time until you are at least okay at it. Don’t give up too soon! As sorry as I am, very few people like couch potatoes who only watch TV or play video games in their free time. Don’t be afraid to do something alone. You may be unfamiliar with this at first and be scared, but it will also increase your self-confidence over time. At some point, it gives you a kick that you can try new things all by yourself! For example, go out to events on your own and go to clubs that interest you, but your friends find boring. Be open-minded and approach people. There is so much you can do if you dare.
Become your best self
Very few of us have what it takes to become a model or an actor in Hollywood. But that doesn’t mean that you have to let yourself go. Get all dressed up, a new haircut, new clothes, and above all, one thing: more self-confidence. If you’re shy and have no idea how to become more confident, Google will be happy to help. There are countless exercises online. And pay attention to your hygiene. Take regular showers (at least once a day), put on fresh clothes every day, etc. But it doesn’t stop with your looks: educate yourself, learn a new language, whatever. The sky is the limit. Just don’t drive yourself crazy with this self-improvement craze and have fun with it.
Don’t pretend, be yourself
If you are now wondering whether this advice does not contradict the previous one, then I will say in no uncertain terms: No. Your personality and interests have nothing to do with whether you are more confident or lead a more exciting life. You just can’t pretend you’re someone else. You want her to fall in love with you, not the guy you’d like to be. Stand by the things you like, your strengths, but also your weaknesses. Just because you become more confident or make more of yourself doesn’t change the basic person you are.
Give her a friendly smile when you speak to her. Make eye contact, but don’t stare at her like a psychopath. Just be a person people like to have around them. Be positive and laugh. Life is too short to deal with negativity anyway. But also be kind to other people. But don’t kiss her butt - no matter how beautiful it is!
Remember what she says and listen carefully
Few things are as embarrassing as not remembering what she told you. Unfortunately, many are not gifted with outstanding memories or space out all the time (sadly I number among that too), but that just means that we then have to work harder. Otherwise, you give her the feeling that you are not interested in her. It’s a pretty big compliment to someone when you memorize the things you’ve been told.
Treat her like a good friend and don’t put her on a pedestal
This is arguably the most crucial piece of advice on this whole list. If you douse her with compliments, gifts, etc., you overwhelm her and give her the feeling that you want to buy her and aren’t actually playing in her league. With a lot of bad luck, this will only throw you into the friendzone. Then she may take advantage of you as heart-balm, but have a crush on entirely different guys. Never put a person on a pedestal, especially if you want something from them. If you treat her like an extremely good friend and just have fun with her, you’ll take a lot of pressure off yourself, but you’ll also show her that you are at eye level.
Tease her in a friendly manner
Teasing is a sign of affection. This saying is true. Teasing her lovingly every now and then can pretty much fan the flames of her feelings. Should she jump on the bandwagon and do the same, then that is an excellent sign. Just don’t overdo it.
Don’t bash her
As already mentioned in the previous tip, it is often very helpful to tease your crush a little. As soon as you get mean, however, you will soon be able to say goodbye to her. See her as an equal, as someone who is on eye level. And there is nothing more pathetic than people who run down other people just to feel better. Unfortunately, there are many who do this unconsciously. So be careful not to mess around with their shortcomings.
Talk to her more often and have great conversations
By that, I mean completely harmless conversations. Ask how the weekend was like, ask follow-up questions, talks about funny topics, listen carefully. If you are a person others like to chat with, you are probably someone they like to spend time with. If you need some help, here are some great articles for you:
- 200+ Questions to ask a girl
- Questions to ask a girl
- 250 Conversation Starters
- 250+ Questions to get to know someone
✍️ August 7, 2020