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🍆 Dirty pick-up lines

They’re so dirty that it’s best not to wear anything white. Some may have different thoughts when it comes to pick-up lines. Still, the dirty ones in particular often go way too far - especially if you don’t even know the person you’re approaching.

If you want to get to know someone through dirty pick-up lines, you must be aware that they rarely go down well. So make sure you don’t get into the wrong person, as these are often sexist or just overly suggestive. If you succeed with them, then hats off!

Very few of these pick-up lines meet my taste, but hey: I was paid to write this article. What’s your excuse for being here?

Have fun, and good luck with our list of the 30 dirtiest pick-up lines!

1. You are so hot, my zipper comes off by itself.

A pick-up line that is suitable for both her and him. Ideal if you find the person you’re talking to really attractive. You even stay relatively safe when it comes to frivolity.

2. Are you an army general? Because you’re having my privates standing at attention.

This saying is primarily suitable if you are a man. If you are a woman, you may need to improvise and replace things when using this saying.

3. Did you sit in a pile of sugar? Because you have a pretty sweet ass!

Don’t we all like a bum that looks good enough to eat?

4. I can read your mind. Yes, I will sleep with you.

If you are being rejected, you can always say: “Oops, I guess I read the one from the person behind you.”

5. I may not go down in history, but I’ll go down on you.

Perfect if both of you study history.

6. Let’s play Barbie. I am Ken, and you are the box that I come in.

If you are a woman, this pick-up line can be easily reversed. The only problem with Barbie and Ken, however, is the lack of genitals. It’s going to be pretty dull that way.

7. Are you a haunted house? ‘Cause I’ll scream as soon as I’m inside you.

This pick-up line will likely feel right at home at a Halloween party. However, I doubt whether you should say it for that reason.

8. Pizza is my second favorite thing that I eat in bed.

And my very favorite is a spoonful of Nutella. What did you think?

9. Is your name winter? Because you’re coming soon.

If you and the person you are talking to happen to be Game of Thrones fans, chances are you can’t go wrong with this pick-up line. Or maybe you will. Nobody said that the person would come with you

10. Do we want to do something that rhymes with “truck”?

They will probably say: “Yuck!”

11. I like my bed, but I’d rather be in yours.

And the next time you can still lie in yours together. Oh, how romantic.

12. Do you need a sin for your next confession?

Fortunately, almost everything in Christianity is sin. You could just eat way too much together. Bam!, sin.

13. Alcohol isn’t the only hard thing here.

Also, the fist that will land in your face afterward.

14. You look great. But do you know what’s missing from your face? Mine.

This one isn’t as dirty as the others. But you could also replace the last word with something else if this variant is too child-friendly for you.

15. Roses are red, violets are fine, you are my 6, and I’ll be your 9.

What do you think this rhyme is all about? I do not understand …

16. I’m not a weather presenter, but tonight is going to be wet.

Because a drink is about to be poured in your face.

17. Girl, do you want to get to the top? You can be on my top if you want to.

At least you leave room for a “No, thanks “.

18. Your outfit would look perfect on the floor of my bedroom.

And your naked body on my bed.

19. I lost my keys. Can I dig for them in your pants?

Somehow I find the very idea of this a bit disgusting. Imagine you really find your keys.

20. Hey, should I come today?

Or should I instead go?

21. You are so selfish. You have this body all your life, and I only want it for one night.

At least you’d be honest if you said that, wouldn’t you?

22. Are you exam material? Because I already studied you like crazy!

This pick-up line is sure to be a hit at student parties!

23. Do you know telekinesis? Because something has just moved with me without anyone touching it.

Enemy Stranger used Psychic. It’s super effective!

24. If I were you, I would sleep with me.

This line would be ideal if you were playing the game If I were you. Since that probably won’t be the case, they’re probably glad that you aren’t them.

25. I don’t feel like myself today. May I feel you?

At least with the tip? (God, why am I saying that?)

26. Are you my homework assignment? Because I’m not doing you, but I definitely should be.

Oh my school days, all the stuff I should have been doing …

27. I made a bet with a buddy. He says women hate oral. Do you want to help me win the bet and convince him otherwise?

I think you will lose this bet.

28. Do you like ramen noodles? Because I’ll be rammin’ my noodle into you.

Jeez, that one’s a bit too much. You are sure to offend someone with that.

29. Never change, just get naked, please.

Kind of cute, right?

30. That might sound corny, but you’re making me horny.

At last, a little rhyme can’t hurt.


That was our list of the 30 dirtiest pick-up lines. I hope you enjoyed yourself; I had my scruples. Maybe you can actually use these pick-up lines to pick someone up or at least make them laugh, which is not wrong either.

If you need more, we also have a great article with the best pick-up lines ready for you. Take a look and have fun.

✍️  August 29, 2020

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